Learning to Flow With Life's Unpredictability
Welcome to my 4am thoughts…
It’s 4am…… and here I am writing it all out!
If you're anything like me, you've mapped out every inch of your life in your head: by this age, you're gonna do this, and by that age, you'll have that. A carefully crafted plan that was supposed to guarantee success.
But life? Life has a funny way of showing up like, “Sike, bitch! We got other plans for you.”
Let me tell you, at the moment, it doesn’t feel good. It feels like your whole world is crumbling and you’re doing everything you can to hold yourself together. It's nerve-racking, uncomfortable, and sparks a certain kind of fear that’s damn near unexplainable.
We grew up in a world that taught us to plan everything out. From the time we were little and they asked, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” our minds got trained to think light years ahead. Always reaching forward, never being present.
Honestly, they should’ve been asking us something different. Like, “What makes you feel alive right now?”or“How do you want to feel as you grow?”
That simple question: what do you want to be? turned a lot of us into anxious adults. Adults scared of failing at some dream our younger selves created before we even knew who the hell we really were. So when life doesn’t go as planned, we spiral:“What did I do wrong?”“Am I being punished?”
The truth is, life is just unpredictable. Maybe our real job is not to fight it, but to learn how to flow with it.
Let me ask you this: have you ever stood in a flowing river?
That feeling of water pushing hard against your legs while you try to keep your balance? You dig your feet in deeper, bracing against the current. That’s us, fighting life.
The water is life’s wild, unpredictable flow. Our resistance? That’s us clinging to the plan we made at 10, the big-ass goals we set at 20, and the heavy-ass expectations everyone else put on us.
Once you surrender, once you stop fighting and let the water take you. It will carry you to places you could’ve never imagined.
We would save ourselves from so many crash outs if we just learned to breathe, loosen our grip, and let go.
So here I am, at 4am, free-writing my way through all the shit I’m feeling as I transition into my mid-thirties. BABY! No one prepared me for the rebirth that happens during this time. It’s exhausting, a little nerve-racking, and honestly a beautiful mess.
If you’re in this season too, feeling the ground shake and the water rising. Just know you’re not alone.
We’re learning to flow!
Journaling Prompts to Help You Flow:
What plans or expectations from your younger self are you still holding onto? Are they still serving you?
When was the last time life said “Sike, bitch!” to your carefully made plans? How did you respond?
What would it feel like in your body to surrender to the flow, even just a little?
If you stopped fighting the current, where do you think life might be trying to take you?
Write a love letter to your present self, not the past version with all the plans, but the you who is still standing in the river, learning to flow.
With Love,
KD